After watching Sex/Life on Netflix,
I started to wonder a lot about monogamy
Haven't we all?
Well, let’s go to google and see what the definition is.
**Spoiler Alert** If you haven’t watched it, the following is a little giveaway.
The main character, Billie, a married woman undergoes a challenge in her life. Her thrill for life and passion was not being “met” by her very stable and handsome, loving, husband Cooper with whom she had been with for 8 years already. Suddenly she began to journal and fantasize about her ex. The ex, Brad was also handsome, wealthy, but legit all about sex. Billie was wild and free prior to meeting Cooper. She explored these wild desires with Brad. She was adventurous and not shy about her sexuality at all. With Cooper, she had settled into motherhood, wife, and housewife in the suburbs.
Keyword: settled. 🙄
Why do people settle at all if they know it won’t be enough?
Billie and Brad had a horrible relationship and breakup. Despite all of that she still thought about Brad often. Billie was not satisfied with her husband (sexually) At one point she thought she could have this with Brad, the whole 100% but because of the toxicity of their relationship- she decided to give Cooper a chance and see if she could have it all. This is when the 80/20 rule comes into play for me. The 80/20 rule is simply the general term or calculation used to exemplify how people operate. When people have the 80% yet lose it all for the 20%, is beyond me. In this case, you could assume that Cooper was meeting Billie’s needs at 80% and Brad was the other 20% that she needed to feel “whole”.
The show also got me thinking about why people cheat at all.
My conclusion: People cheat because they cannot fulfill their own happiness so they become dependent on external factors like sex to make them feel complete.
So the follow-up question or curiosity is :
Can monogamy be achieved when someone in a marriage like Billie and Cooper’s struggles with sexual fantasies and desires?
My prognosis is Hell Nah!
Lillian likes to share her thoughts. Sometimes her experiences are shared here and on her podcast; True Lessons
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